7:16 a.m. I found my way into alpha state pretty quickly during meditation last night. I was proud. Then I realized I was just losing consciousness from the caramelized onions. I did self-hate pushups and shame-myself situps before drinking a gallon of water and reciting my mantra, don’t pee the bed, don’t pee the bed….

kirk hensler

5:41 p.m. We just got home from Venice. This is my first time contributing to the Whole30 blog today because I already wrote 2900 words on another topic – winning political arguments. I had a blow out with an old classmate followed by an accusation towards my own mother in the last two days and…

kirk hensler

8:16 a.m. I weighted myself again. Because you know you weigh the least first thing in the morning. Only regret is that Jonah was in the tub and I couldn’t take a dump first. 8:56 a.m. “Do you want to eat this?” Jonah asks as he holds out a baked marshmallow cookie. “No Jonah, we…

kirk hensler

9:08 a.m. I forgot to do a Week In Review yesterday. So, after some thought, I realized I could just do a Halfway Point Analysis today and act like I planned it that way. Horrible sleep again last night. Not feeling well at all. My nose is permanently shut. I’m overwhelmed just watching Alexis try…

kirk hensler

8:40 a.m. United gave me 20,000 miles back from a three page complaint letter I sent regarding our flights home from Barcelona. It’s a bit of an art with them – the right amount of complaining, status mentioning, threats to use another airline, disbelief that they care so little about a customer, and then a…

kirk hensler

7:20 a.m. It feels like I’m up way too early. I know half of you have already taken three kids to school and done P90X while pumping for your newborn, and I envy and admire your drive, I’m just not there yet. Mornings are a delicate and overwhelming time. I have to go to that…

kirk hensler

8:21 a.m. It hit me last night, the perfect combination of factors. There was pressure, wind, and a little bit of uncertainty. My stomach felt like a hot bowl of soup. Alexis was lying peacefully in bed. I hovered off to the side, assuming a deep sumo squat. “Look at your balls!” she yelled before…

kirk hensler

8:53 a.m. N.A.U.S.E..A. 9:03 a.m. I’m pretty sure we went to bed at like 11 last night. I’m not positive because I didn’t check the time, but I know it was early. And we didn’t wake up this morning until just before 9. It’s raining outside and I want to sleep all day. Somewhere during…

kirk hensler

8:17 a.m. Double digits, bitches, I mean, ya’ll. Too aggressive. Sorry. 1/3 through. It’s all about the fractions now. Did you make the paper rings out of construction paper to count down to Christmas when you were little? I loved those. Okay, so I watched two episodes last night, not one. I don’t understand how…

kirk hensler

5: 33 p.m. Thinking about doing this all in one swoop tonight. I made a commitment not to be on my computer all day today because it’s Saturday and I’m trying to engage in the good graces of the collective weekend vibe. Let’s start with this morning. I woke up with my neck thrown out….

kirk hensler