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Day 1 - 10 Day Tune Up - kale & cigarettes
Day 1 – 10 Day Tune Up

Day 1 – 10 Day Tune Up

People are coming out hot. I do feel a sense of pressure to be the best writer in the group because I created the group. It’s not an active thought but I catch it creeping around back there sometimes. I will try not to overcompensate for that by writing safely like a coward. I’m going to go in on what’s real as I always do and hope that after 10 days I am a better writer and a more clear person. That’s what this is about.

I  just came up with the prompts as  I was sitting there. Didn’t put too much thought into them. But if you were a psychotherapist or a detective or any type of analytic you could reverse engineer even the smallest action into the makeup of an entire person. At least I think I can.

I’m not writing about lying this evening because I fall into the fortunate category of having something I want to write about already. It’s easier for me than being held down by an assignment. That’s how I’m telling it anyway. An alternative storyline could be that I don’t have anything compelling to write about in the field of lying and coming up with something makes me feel stifled and vulnerable and not skillful as a writer so I’m opting to go my own way. Something I’ve always done.

Controlling tendencies can be linked to great success. If I feel weak in a situation I tend not to repeat it. If I’m really good at something or I like something a certain way I try very hard to make it the way I do things. That makes me look strong. Perhaps no more or less capable than the person next to me, just more in control of my environment, shaping it to suit my needs and highlight my strengths so that I don’t have to unravel in front of a crowd or fall short on an assignment because it’s not in my wheelhouse.

Control is admirable because it results in power. Powerful people can and will do whatever they want. It’s not because they are bad people. Maybe people on the side will moan about it under their breath but they won’t stand up and stop the powerful people. No, because they are drifters. Drifters take the current and they go where the things come. Controllers are also makers and they make the world the rest of us live in. Not because they are greatly inspired or because they want to make the world a better place, but because they are brutally intense and constantly in a state of suffering if things aren’t just right.

In a way I am lying every time I open my mouth because my words are a reflection of the way I want things to be seen and recorded. Just watch what people do. That’s all we can do. Over time, we see who they are and who we are.

The real topic of discussion tonight is my one true gift. And that is the gift of apartments.

You might hear a lot of people complaining about looking for a place to stay or finding a lot of stress in the apartment searching process. Not I. As we sit here in our new giant 2 bedroom apartment overlooking the sunset and the tip top of the skyline in the most coveted neighborhood in San Diego I have to believe I have some kind of special power. Not walking through walls, not mind-reading, but finding really really great apartments.

I woke up, turned to Alexis and said, “It’s time to move.” I went on Craigslist and scrolled for a minute before finding one. We met the owners the next day. We signed the lease the day after that. They gave us a full month of free rent and said we could do whatever we wanted with the place. Nice people. Amazing neighborhood.

The day after that we were walking outside and noticed a FOR RENT sign on a commercial space 3 doors down from our place. Called the guy. Saw it the next morning. Went through a little hell and signed that lease 3 days later.

Now we pretty much own South Park.

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