What is true and what is real? I’m sitting on my mcm chair while Alexis lays on the couch across from me looking at a black and white ballet photo book I picked up in Paris. We are heading there in October. She is a great dancer. It makes you wonder sometimes why people don’t …
There is not a cubic millimeter on my body that wants to write tonight. I’m fresh off 36 hours of traveling with a raging alcoholic that guzzles whiskey like Gatorade. 36 hours that might as well have been quadrupled because I spent the whole time strategically avoiding someone that was sitting right next to me …
It really becomes a game of strategically managing your snacking and your email checking and your web browsing – working 9-5 that is. How many more minutes until the next 15 minute break? How can I break that up by taking a walk to the water fountain or by pretending to need to research a …
Well it finally happened. I knew this day was coming. I was walking up the ramp towards my room to grab some shredded cheese and tortillas when I saw the cleaning cart outside my door. And my door was open. I walked lightly towards my room, creeping my head a few inches in front of …
“If I send you a picture of my boobs for the next 18 days can I be done with the writing challenge?” I’m tempted because they are my kryptonite. But I’ll be home in 5 days and that is just bad business. “Sorry babe. I’ll be stuffing mouthfuls soon anyway. No deal.” “Dang it.” It …
I can’t come up with shit for an idea. It is, in fact, fact that everyone thinks their own writing is dog shit. Although there are a few articles I’ve written that I still love because I really meant what I was saying. I also like going back to old articles and reading all the …
Uncontrollable gas might be considered a problem for a lot of people. Not for me. It means that every 8 – 10 minutes of the entire day I get to laugh out loud and then hope someone is downwind of me when I sit patiently and await their facial expression. Truly I am happy right …
It’s safe to say that the yellow and brown stains on the sheets and towels in this mountain hotel are the effects of karma from all of the hotel towels I have ejaculated into in my day. I always wondered if my mom knew when I threw my cum rag down with all the laundry. …
I don’t really know what to write about tonight. I told Alexis about the threat ISIS put on Malaysia, two of the targets being places we frequent every day while we’re staying here. I’m not concerned about the danger, I will find a stone on the ground and bash their heads into sloppy joes, but …
“You need to have compassion for yourself,” she said. I busted out laughing. I don’t know why that is what I did but it was uncontrollable. “Why are you laughing?” “I honestly don’t know.” We sat on a cement bench over looking the second oldest jungle in the world. “You can keep your eyes open …
